As you know, I was reading my most favourite novel Eat, Pray, Love. I was reading this part where Liz writes a petition to God asking to end her marriage and give her a smooth divorce. Then I thought what if I write a letter to God? You know, like a written rant rather than something vocal! Just pouring my heart out and asking for few things for the wellness of me and others, mostly others so they can escape my big mouth! They say the God is always watching you! I must tell you that it is kind of creepy to know that someone is ALWAYS watching you. So, I know you know the things I do every macro, nano second still I feel the need to emphasis it because you of all know how much I can talk.
Yesterday, I was walking to my grandmother’s house with my mother. We were looking at the dark clouds and predicting if it would rain or not when this acquaintance of my mother appeared out of nowhere. This man was shouting at the highest pitch possible and walked towards us. First of all, please! Please! give my mother the patience to wear her glasses ALL the time except for the times she sleeps. So as usual she saw a figure approaching us but was not able to find who that was. My mom asked who it was and I told her who that man was. They started talking about something spiritual and he gets nosy like everyone else. You know what I am going to tell you. It’s like I have cancer.*I am totally annoyed when I say this* This man asked my mother if she is looking for an alliance, if she is not, if they have stopped looking for one or they are still looking for one. He asked all this at once. She said she is looking and kept walking which obviously meant she is not interested in talking about it. But then this man still went ahead and asked for my age. She said, ‘28’ you should have seen the look on his face. He was shocked. How come this girl is so “old” and still roaming around with mom predicting about rain and enjoying the petty things in life? Obviously, now I am “too old” I should “compromise”, right? He had the nerve to propose an alliance where the guy is earning only 15,000 (no offence), a state Government employee and is 8 years elder to me. *You are kidding right!* My mom politely asked him to back off. Here’s the problem, I earn quadruple times of what he earns! Plus, I didn’t go to this man and cry that I am so desperate to marry that I am ready to marry a man who is 8 years elder to me. I just wish people could mind their own business and understand that I am enjoying my life and everything about it. A husband is missing but he is going to eventually come. It is a simple funda, If I am looking for him, he is looking for me too we will meet when the time is right and make our life a mess. Why does it have to be so complicated? I wish people can understand that. I wish you or I can make people understand that. I am so sick of people looking at me like I am suffering from a chronic disease. Like their children are “settled” in life and I am still roaming around the streets like a nomad. Why can’t people see beyond marriage? I mean I am doing so well in life but that doesn’t matter people say. They say I should be having a kid now. But who wrote that where? I would like to know. I know I cannot change things or the way people think but I know I can make myself stronger to endure this crap. So, either send my man to me or give me the strength to tolerate these morons who are constantly judging me and my life until he comes. (God! Do I sound desperate!)
But this is not the only thing for which I need more strength. I cannot change what is happening around me but I can always decide how to handle it. I need patience in “ABUNDANCE”. You know why it is in double quotes and caps. I need patience to tackle people who talk behind my back. I somehow end up knowing what they had spoken. You know about this lady who has always been very friendly to me at work but the things she’s told about me when I was not around is outrageous. Even today, if I see her somewhere I would smack her right on her face. I want you to protect the good people from the horrendous hypocrites like this woman so that doesn’t change who they are in due course. I want you to protect these disgusting two-faced people from me so I don’t physically hurt them! Give us (the good people, I mean) the wisdom to ignore them and not stoop ourselves to their levels. (Yes. Yes. I included myself into the list of good people)
There are very few people in my life I value more than myself. I ask you to give me the strength to love them no matter what they put me through and give them a little more strength to bear with me. Please spread love, happiness and positivity in this world inspite of the accidents, war, deaths, dreadful viruses and global warming. I wish rapists are hung to death! No positivity there!
Then there comes really petty things like I wish they opened a gangotri or any chat centre in my locality where I can go and hog to my heart’s content. Please, please, please give me a higher metabolism rate or make me hyper active only when I want to go to the gym. Is there a way to improve my metabolism rate? Like, make it super fast so I don’t have to feel guilty everytime I eat chocolates or icecreams or a plate full of briyani. How can one give up briyani? It is next to impossible for me. *drools* I wish it rained every evening in Chennai. You know how beautiful Chennai is when it rains, right? Right?
Finally, I ask you to give me the strength to love and persuade with my passion no matter what because without it I am lifeless, without the fire to achieve what I want to be, I am dead. Please be by my side. It’s ok even it sounds creepy about you watching me all the time. Be my legal stalker and stay with me forever while you take care of the rest as well.
Oh hey! Next year, I HAVE TO, NEED TO go to Ladakh. I am really desperate about it and I cannot wait anymore. So yea, I am going. If possible get me a company or I would just go alone and you come along. Either way, you come along. We are going. Period!