She sat there confused looking at the church out of her window. The weather was pleasant, a squishy breeze blew past her face, she smelled the first drops on earth it was enchanting. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Her mind was calm, extraordinarily calm Which was surprising to her. She was not crying anymore, she did not cry in first place she tried but she couldn’t, it was like this was expected to happen. She did not feel a thing about her lose ‘because it is not your lose, it is someone else’s!’ a voice whispered. She nodded. She looked at the notebook where she had written a two liner –
When someone becomes your weakness,
You become their slave.
She smiled and recalled the conversation she had had with that someone who was not a lovable, adorable sweet heart anymore. He was venom, a slow poison that was spreading all her body giving her only pain. His touch is vicious, kiss was malignant, he was seducing her into a deep pit, a pit she could never come back from, a pit that will make her stupid for eternity. Her mobile beeped, she took it to read the text from him. ‘I am sorry, it’s my mistake. I won’t do it again!’ he had sent. She smiled, it was not the usual smile, she smiled because she was expecting this message from him so she could be fooled again. But this time she was determined, she know what she wanted from her life, he will not be her weakness anymore.
‘There’s no more again! It’s over between us.’ She punched the reply and switched off her phone. She felt a sense of relief, for the first time she was not letting him take her for granted. She was happy about letting him go so she won’t have to cry again, she won’t have to wait for him to call her. She can be on her own, she can live her life. She stepped out of her house on the porch. The rain had stopped and the water droplets had settled on the beautiful flowers and leaves in her garden. She touched the droplets on the iron railing on her porch and smiled. She looked at the sky and noticed the rays of sun struggling to come past the thick, dark clouds. She took stepped out of her house and sun rays gleamed its path out in the garden, it was like the Gods were inviting her. She kept her palm over her forehead to avoid the direct sunlight and looked at the sky.
‘should I ask for what I want?’ She asked herself.
‘You should! It’s high time.’ A voice replied her.
‘But I have never asked for what I wanted…’ she said touching the soft petals of the hibiscus and kissing them gently.
‘So what? Ask now! Your wish might be granted.’ The voice replied and the hibiscus moved rhythmically like it was dancing in gay after the rain.
‘What if I don’t get it? You know how much it means to me!’ She said still in a dilemma to look up and ask God.
‘Maybe he knows you want it so badly, Maybe he’s waiting for you to ask it. He might give it to you! Ask him. Be brave!’ Said the voice.
‘What if I don’t get it?’ She asked but never got a reply.
A drop of water dropped on her face from the gulmohar tree. She looked up and saw a squirrel playing with another. She ran with them following their path. She ran out of her house and to the woods nearby. The squirrels kept jumping and running from each other. On her way into the woods she saw a deer that ran at her advent, she left the squirrels and ran behind the deer, She came across a beautiful red flower that was huge and magnificent. Although urged to pluck the flower she restrained she touched the velvet petals of the flower. On hearing the crinkling noise of water she ran in the direction where the sound came from, moments later it led her to a little beautiful stream, the crystal clear water reflected the sun’s rays, she knelt down to taste the water. Although hesitant in the beginning she leaned over to taste the water. The water tasted strangely sweet, she drank some more when she laid her eyes on a wet wooden log. Giant ants ran over her foot she realized she was bare foot, she jumped to shoo away the ants and laughed as she jumped. And then she decided to go over the wooden bridge to find what was on the other side. It led to a beautiful lake, that was alone and sober the giant mountains on the other side of the lake was a treat to the eyes. Her jaws dropped in astonishment, she looked around and saw a large old hose lying across the shore. She made her effort to climb the hose and sat on top of the hose looking at the giant mountains and the beautiful sunrays coming through it.
‘And so when you started exploring you found a beautiful place. When you start asking you will get something wonderful, something you have been longing to have! So ask!’ Said the voice a little firmer this time. She looked around to see if there was someone apart from her, but all she saw was huge eucalyptus trees and a wide crystal clear lake. She closed her eyes with a subtle smile to ask God what she wanted!