I have come across few people who have a problem in accepting them for what they are! There are people who are ashamed of talking in their native language, trust me I know few people whom I’ve met saying, “I don’t find it comfortable to converse in Tamil”. I have not been to other parts of India much but I have quite a number of friends whom I know from other parts of India and they are not really ashamed of talking in their native language, they don’t feel bad about saying I am from this part of the country and I have gone through so many hurdles to get here. They don’t say, ‘Oh I am much more comfortable with English than my native language’ even to a person who wants to talk to you in your native language.
I am not a racist or I am not from the group that says you should speak every word that would possibly come out of your mouth in Tamil. But why not talk in Tamil when the other person is a tamilian too and he/she is fine conversing in native? I am very comfortable conversing in English but when it comes to my friends and if they are all Tamilians, I wouldn’t mind conversing in my local tongue, infact I love it. It gives me that desi touch and I find the conversation more enjoyable and not decent, who says you have to maintain decency with your friends? And my friends who are from other parts of the country are eager to learn my language, when we are at a movie theater they read the posters of Tamil movie and ask for the meaning, I love it when they speak Tamil it is so funny yet cute, I mean they would feel the same when I try to talk Hindi or Punjabi(Oh! I so much want to talk Punjabi!) and when I try to understand a poem in Hindi or Punjabi or Urdu (I can read and write Hindi very well! Thanks to me I chose my second language as Hindi) they explain it to me with so much enthusiasm, wow! But one of our Tamil friends said “aaah.. I think this is the meaning, I am not sure either” Honestly I feel humiliated, my Tamil friend doesn’t know the meaning of Tamil words. I have not learnt Tamil professionally but my mom kept hitting me on my head to learn and write it, so here I am as good as a Tamil Pandit!
This is not the only thing people are ashamed off. Will you be surprised if I say that I have come across people who try to hide the place they come from, the status of their family, their marks. Few even lie about the college they studied in and the background of their family and parents! I don’t understand why you have to lie about these things this is what you are and this is where you come from, a lie cannot change it. There are certain things in life you cannot choose your parents, your birth, your death – you can choose to die but you really dying is not in your hands! You can choose to change your religion but you are what you are OK, this is a totally different topic that I don’t want to get into now.
So why is it so hard to be you? I am not rich, Like how Jimmy says in raising hope (A comedy Series) I am from a lower, lower, lower middle class family, My parents are not grads still they worked so hard to bring me up and they know about everything in this world, Yes! Everything and they can talk about everything. We are not wealthy but they passed on few precious habits to me Read as many books as you can, they taught me to be outspoken and always speak the truth. I picked writing from my mother, oh! She writes beautifully and drawing from my father. They gave me a wonderful treasured wealth – Education and that from their hard earned money and because we weren’t rich I know the value of money and where to spend it. I am a miser and I don’t mind saying that out, sometimes I am happy for not spending lavishly on things that are just a luxury! I studied in a very normal college that my parents could afford they surely were not able to give me an Engineering degree but I was able to get into a very good company with the education they gave me. I don’t lie or fake my identity. I am to be an proud Indian and I love India no matter how corrupted it is! I love it for what it is! I love to speak my mother tongue. Infact I have many reasons to be proud of it. It is one the most ancient languages in India, it has existed for over 2000 years! And has 247 alphabets. I am proud of what I am and where I come from. I am a Madrasi like how few say, I don’t get offended! Yes, I am. I am happy to live my life. I don’t want to be someone because there are few who wants to be me! So that’s happening because I am me! I might not be rich and wealthy but I can tell that I am the happiest person at the moment; because I have not faked my identity to the people I met! They know me and that’s me, they love me because I am me!
So do you fake? Time to confess to yourself, because that’s not you! Be truthful to yourself first! Listen to your conscious, You have no idea how much it hates you for you lying about yourself!