Kids – the very word puts a wide smile on your face! They are naughty, funny, honest, truthful, irritating, disgusting (at times!) still we looooveeee them! They are representatives of God and that’s why they don’t fear to talk the truth and be honest with you. They never think before asking something to you.
There is a series of function happening at my home and we have relatives from all over India and world. We have a society at home now. My 11 year old nephew who’s come from Dubai is a voracious reader who went around suggesting me few books of P.G-Wodehouse, science fiction novels and I was so surprised when he criticized the work of Chetan Bhagat. A 11 year old kid calling his work crap! No Way! I was so horrified and told my cousin that he shouldn’t be reading his books right now considering the fact that there are few A stuff on that one! To which my brother answered, “well, I tell him the pages he should skip and he promptly does that” I still cannot accept it. None of us could.
So, I shared my room with him as he found it “artistic!” He said, “Gayu’s room it’s so perfect and artistic! She’s gotta good taste you know, I just cannot stop admiring those wind chimes made of clay.” 😀 I explained him they are terracotta and yes they are made of clay but he should refer them as terracotta. He was looking at me for a while and said, “Well, does that make a difference. It’s clay anyway!” Sigh!! What to do, he’s a GUY after all! 😉
He was overexcited about the society at my house and became a terminator of my sleep one day. Next day, we had a function at home. My cousin’s kid has completed his one year on planet earth and we were celebrating it authentically. All of us were getting ready for the “ayushhomam” where the kid’s ears are pierced and they perform poojas. All of us went to sleep at 2 AM, we were asked to wake up at 6 in the morning (Hola??) so we could get ready for the function and be there on time. I set an alarm and went to sleep. My nephew who was really excited after seeing so many people together found it really hard to sleep (which I guess).
At 4 AM –
“Gayu, what time is it?”
“It’s 4 Rishab, go to sleep.”
“OK so when will it be 6?”
“When the alarm beeps it’ll be 6.”
“When will the alarm beep?”
“When it’ll be 6. Now just go to sleep!”
This was going on every 15 mins and finally –
“Gayu, I have a question.” I woke up, rested my head on my arm and got ready to undergo the, “when will it be 6” torture!
“What if it’s already 6 and your alarm device.” He pointed the alarm clock, “failed to beep!”
“Did they teach you to depict the time in school? Even if they didn’t, this is a digital clock, so what do you see?”
“Yes, they did and amm.. it’s 5.30. But that doesn’t answer my question Gayu! What if the alarm fails to beep?”
I rolled my eyes, I mean how do you answer this one man, this kid is driving me nuts! So my patience was all drained out and I wasn’t able to bear this horrendous torture anymore.
“Rishab, just get out of my room before I kick you and let me sleep.”
“What are you going to do sleeping for half an hour? Come let’s go play UNO.”
“UNO! You want to play UNO this early in the morning? GET OUT!!” I screamed and he finally stormed out of the room, Guess what!! The God forbidden alarm beeped. He slowly peeped in and said, “Bingo! It’s working Gayu.”
The next prank he plays with me is he knocks my head and say, “Can you hear a sound?”
“Tong.. Tong… coz it’s hollow right!” AArrrrgghh!!
I have always had an aversion for kids but I somehow end up spending hours together with them. One of my friend who hates kids tell me that he’s tired of them being around all the time as his mum is a pediatrician. The other day we were at a theater to watch Tintin, and a kid bumped on him he went so furious and scared the kid by staring at him so hard. I always tell him that he’ll end up having the maximum number of kids in our gang!
MasterChef USA one of my favorite shows on TV in one of their episodes asked their contestants to serve 200 hungry kids and wow! That was the best episode ever!! One of the contestants said, “Kids have no filter, they are going to be as honest as they could and that scares the hell outta me!” Oh yea so true! Once I tried a new hair cut and my cousin’s son who’s just 5 years old complimented me saying, “you look great! Gorgeous!” and kissed me. Wow!!
Another day, we were chatting online doing all the doodle stuff, when he said, “Gayu, momma prepared apple custard today and it S***ed, think trex’s p**p would taste better! :O I told about her son using the S word.
Oh my GOD!!! My little baby’s tasted our dog’s poop!! Was my cousin’s reaction! and then I decided that I will not have dogs when I have kids!
Kids today! I love them! J